not waving but drowning

All new Trading Spouses-related posts are to be made in this thread only! Posts elsewhere on the site may be deleted without warning. Thank you!

Quick Links:
Setting the Abbott Family's Reality Record Straight
The Abbott Family's Reality Page Check this out!
The Abbott's Photo Gallery: A "Slice of Life"


  • edited December 1969

    it is indeed true that all of us (humans) are natural born taoists,

    in fact that is exactly what and who we are, however, at some point in time the thread is severed...

    i am trying extremly hard to reattach the thread, and have been for about 4 years, and slowly slowly its beginning to mesh,


    i am meshing while all of those around me remain unattached (besides a minischule minority) this is difficult

    i sometimes untwine a little i become forgetfull, my mind wanders, i cannot focus
    i lose my ability to wave and instead find myself drowning in a tangled sea of threads....

    what do you suggest?
  • edited December 1969
    I was much too far out all my life
    and not waving but drowning
    -stevie smith
    well, start by reading more positive poets-LOL

    it's a slow process. be patient
    let the waves wash you back to shore
    when you get there you may be different than you were when you were there before, but accept that, expect that, and go with it. peace
  • edited December 1969
    [Moved: I took the liberty of moving this discussion to the "Tangents and Other Angles" page, so it wouldn't be mixed in with all the other Lounge discussions. :-) ]
  • JoeJoe
    edited December 1969
    Welcome Red Tulip.

    One of the most important things for me to remember, when I'm struggling to make sense of life, desire and suffering, is that we're all in the same boat. I often feel isolated, lonely in trying to "embrace" the way of Taoism, especially in an Iowa community that's predominantly Christian.

    But people are more alike than not. When I think I'm on the "right" path, and that "they" are wrong, then I'm missing the point. Having compassion for everyone helps me have more compassion for myself, as I struggle with the cards that have been dealt to me.

    In terms of untwining, forgetting, having your mind wander, that again is something that we all share to some extent or another. I like the perspective of Buddhist Insight Meditation, in paying attention to the breath. The point isn't to achieve perfect harmony, etc. but to help us be more aware of how this mental wandering and forgetfulness is so strong in our lives. Truly paying 100% attention in the moment is difficult, but it can get better with practice.

    I often feel like I'm not getting anywhere. But if I compare where I'm at now, with a year ago, I am making slow movement in the directions I would like to. I just have to remember that it's always movement along the path; if I think I've arrived at "truth", then it's a sure sign that I haven't.
  • edited December 1969
    [cite] Joe:[/cite]... be more aware of how this mental wandering and forgetfulness is so strong in our lives. Truly paying 100% attention in the moment is difficult, but it can get better with practice....

    Yes, welcome Red Tulip,

    I'd add that it is also extremely [chref=63]easy[/chref]. Now this may seem at odds with what Joe said, but in fact it isn't. The [chref=2]difficult and the easy[/chref] differ no more than the eye of the beholder sees and believes. So, we might say it can become a self fulfilling prophecy.

    Watching where you are rather than where you are going is simply a matter of what you [chref=53]prefer[/chref]. As with everything in life, it really boils down to what you really want. We get sidetracked on by-paths because something 'there', that we desire, lures us in.

    The frustration we feel come from wanting our cake and eat it too. We have an idealized desire of what we want in life, and then often at odds with that is our life's emotional reality. We [chref=73] hate[/chref] this, we love that. And this leads us to [chref=8]contend[/chref] with ourselves, our ideals vs. reality.

    It is ironic that we are our own worst enemy - the war within. As with any war, with surrender comes peace. Be patient; if you wish to surrender and lay aside this inner war, [chref=36]you must first set it up[/chref], as it appears you are now doing.
  • edited December 1969
    In my readings to further my finding the way, an author named Daniel Quinn once wrote ",if you take this educational journey with me, you're going to find yourself alienated from people around you" (Ismael pg 37)
    Now for me this has not meant I have become completely ostercized yet most people whom I care about and vice versa are hesitant to engage in strong conversation as they,as most , may not be willing to make the simple changes nescisarry
Sign In or Register to comment.